Self-help books could be quite deceiving and tend to disappoint us on so many occasions, but a big part of that is actually our fault.

We can’t pick the ones with tempting titles, sit in bed with a jar of Nutella, read and nod away, imagining the better scenarios of our perfect selves and expecting to miraculously feel good.

It is very easy to believe in what many of those books promise — from an overnight end to grieving to suddenly having the self-confidence we have always dreamed of — regardless of the effort we make.

Yet one book can never apply to the whole lot of us, females, from different cultures, mindsets and individually set principles. We all know how each of us can get sometimes; our hormones really manage to take the toll out of a very normal situation on many occasions. Hell, we would need a book for every hormonal change, let alone every female.

Human nature is confusing to say the least and we all need to be able to deal with its emotional, mental, and psychological rollercoaster mess. But self-improvement books are not always the way to go, especially if we trust them so blindly.

Get critical

There’s a thin line between allowing some of those words to get through while we do some thinking on our part, and suddenly shutting out all rationale and giving in to the ‘magic.’

“Self-help books are a great tool to utilize, but only if the author is credible and is basing his book on scientific evidence,” Nahed Barakat, M.A., Clinical Psychology Doctoral Candidate, tells 19TwentyThree.

If you would rather resort to self-help books, make sure you at least run an in-depth background check about the authors and their specialization. You owe it to your mind to feed it with worthy tips and stimulants.

“If there’s an area in your life that you feel needs improvement, doing background research on the author’s area of expertise is of paramount importance,” says Barakat.

We need to start questioning the actual substance those books have and the quality of help they offer us. We need to get past the attractively designed books that we mostly end up hiding behind all the other mind stimulating books.

Barakat warns, however, not every psychological issue can be solved through self-help issues.

“If the problem that you’re facing is impeding your functioning — be it social, academic, or work-related — seeking help from a professional will be more beneficial,” she says.

You also need to remember though that it doesn’t stop at reading the book, you still have to do all the work and take action to see the difference you’re hoping for.

The Experts Recommend:

Mind Over Mood: Change How You Feel By Changing the Way You Think: By Dennis Greenberger and Christine A. Padesky. Available at Diwan Bookstore  for LE 187.

Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life: By Steven C. Hayes. Avaialable on Amazon.com for LE 70 for the print edition and LE 120 for the Kindle edition.

The Road Less Traveled: written by M. Scott Peck, a prominent Psychiatrist and one of the founding fathers of the self-help books genre, this is a personal recommendation for a book that had a great impact on my thoughts and spiritual path. Available at Diwan Bookstore for LE 50.

Diwan Bookstore  • 159, 126^th of July Street, Zamalek • Tel. +2 (02) 2736-2582 • 105, Abu Bakr El Seddik Street, Heliopolis • Tel. +2 (02) 2690-8184 • Open daily from 10 am to 10 pm.